Friday, August 17, 2012

Joke of the Day: The FBI's Anti-Piracy Seal Will Protect Your Work

The FBI has announced that any and all copyright holders, including photographers, can now use their official, anti-piracy, warning seal on their works as a way of deterring would-be copyright infringers.

Whoop-dee-fucking-doo!

Besides the obvious question most photographers should be asking, "Do I really want that gross and ugly government seal marring my otherwise beautiful photo?" Does anyone really believe posting the FBI's warning seal will deter anyone intent on ripping off your work?

Here's a bit of FYI for those who might think posting the FBI's seal amounts to anything more than "squat" in terms of protecting your work: The likelihood the FBI will investigate any claims you might make against someone who has ripped you off remains... drum roll please... zero.

The motion picture industry has been using the FBI's anti-piracy seal on their video releases for many years. Last time I looked at piracy problems in the motion picture industry, the problem remains a big problem. In more recent years, what with the web and all, it's probably a bigger problem than ever! And that's in spite of their long-standing use of J. Edgar's seal. That's an industry, BTW, with billions of dollars behind it. You know, billions of dollars they can draw on for lawyers and investigators and, well, wielding the FBI's seal like it's some magical Hogwartian spell protecting against copyright infringement.

The adult film industry, an industry I know a little about from first-hand experience, has been using FBI warnings on the fronts of their video releases for at least twenty years and guess what? The adult film industry is in the toilet. Why? You guessed it: Piracy.  So much for the FBI's seal  or supposedly intimidating warnings having any juice or effect when it comes to taking a bite out of intellectual property crimes.

I certainly don't have any *REAL* solutions to the problems associated with piracy but I know that one such *IMAGINARY* solution, i.e., the FBI's anti-piracy seal, is just that: An imaginary solution. In fact, it's a freakin' joke.

Gosh, I feel so much safer and secure, copyright-wise, with that ugly-ass FBI seal on my photo of Sasha above.(Click to enlarge.)


4 comments:

Rick Horowitz said...

I love you, JimmyD. You're hilarious.

Not as funny as the FBI, but still hilarious!

jimmyd said...

:-)

Dale Austin said...

I've said more than once that if the folks who get their panties in a wad over online porn really wanted to shut most of it off, they'd just ask the FBI to deal with the piracy.

Of course, that would mean that various Christian groups would have to come out in favor of the intellectual property rights of the adult industry. Wouldn't that make for strange bedfellows.

jimmyd said...

@Dale Austin: Government and various groups have struggled, for quite a while, with exactly what you're saying, Dale. Currently, some groups, along with the City of LA, are trying to force the industry into using condoms and actively enforcing OSHA standards on adult film sets. While that sounds quite reasonable from an occupational, protect-the-worker perspective, encouraging OSHA to monitor porn sets and enforce work-place safety standards also means you're recognizing the porn biz as a legitimate business. While shooting adult in LA is legal, they sure don't like recognizing it being "legitimate." It's the old battle of the law versus what is and isn't socially acceptable... not too dissimilar from civil law versus religious doctrine.